Opinionated Solutions to Life's Problems

Lots of opinions, Lots of options, Lots of hidden answers to Life's convulated questions.

Location: California, United States

LIKES: India, Music, Math, Dance, Advertising, Statistics, Optimism, Dreams, Strong opinions, Rains, Bike rides, Caribbean Sea, Jamaica, Waterfalls, Swimming, Stray dogs, Full moon, Tagore, F.R.I.E.N.D.S., Junglee sandwich, Phone talks, Jasmine flowers, Short work meetings, Fridays & Saturdays, Chocolate ice-cream at mid-night. HATES: Sweet tongued liars & Bitter tongued liars

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Modesty- the best policy?

I received a very motivating email forward this morning, you know, not the regular inspirational message that tells you ten things about friendship in a weepy powerpoint and then tells you to forward it to ten friends lest you want to lose ALL your money and your EK AKELA BF in just ten minutes.

This one was ekdum alag, it had a long list of things that will make you contented and happy at the end of a long day if you did them/put them into practice/understood them. I took fancy to one particular sentence that said: "Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born." It stuck me because it was so simple. And so very difficult to achieve. Atleast, IMHO.

I truly believe that the higher a person goes, the easier it is to be modest. Imagine a person whose resume reads like a dream--- Best school- Harvard or Oxford, Best job- CEO of Google or some such super hot company, University accolades, Co-curricular activities ka champion and all those small little perfect things that adorn a dream resume. Add to this a George Clooney face and a Bill Clinton personality. Theek hai chalo, Ek Carmen Electra jaise biwi bhi karlo add.

Now, I believe that it is simpler for this person to be modest and underplay some of his achievements. The world already knows him, talks about him, worships him. Kitne saare log look upto him as Big Boss. He has a LOT of things going for him so its easier for him to be modest saying "Nahi, mein itna bhi mahaan nahi" with a shy shahrukh khan dimpled smile.

Now, take another scenario of an average guy--- B+ schooling grades, thik thak university and a decent paying job. No George clooney resemblance here but definitely a khwab for that Carmen look alike next door. This guy does a great job at one of the company meetings and then brags about it for the next one year to all his friends, family, neighbours, and the doodhwala. He tells everyone who earns less than him, how successful he is at his job and how much they will have to work to reach at his position. "Yeh aasan nahi hai" he would say with a sly shakti kapoor style, as if he has the mantra to turn sand to gold, when an innocent looking junior tries to know the secret to his "success".

Do we know one of these people here? Do we? I think we do. A majority of us would fall under the second category- average success in most fields with a relative decent success thrown in one of the things that we excel in. Would you leave a chance to blow your own horn if its probably something great that you have done in a long time? (And the fact that you know it is going to be another zillion years to your next achievement!) Would you be full of humility and modesty and shake off the ' Wah Wah's' with a smile saying, "It's nothing."?

I think it is very difficult being modest. It is more difficult being modest when you know you have achieved something big and no one seems to be recognizing it, talking about it. That said, I want to be a more modest person. I am working at it. Bada mushkil hai!

Music: Intehaan ho gayi from 'Sharabi'
Mood: Optimistic


Blogger Chitrangada said...

Nice talk about modesty but I think it vary ppl to ppl ..I have seen few ppl with so much of simplicity and big achievement n yes i there r ppl like u describe in second category ..:) ..mushkil toh hain modest hona but ..the question arises ..If someone don feel proud of his/his achievement then who is going to see it ..nowdays we see what ppl show us ..actually we see the outer things nowdays .isnt ?

12:19 AM  
Blogger Aashun said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:32 PM  
Blogger Aashun said...

well said, just want to add that there are some moments in life that u say to hell with modesty and perform
muhammad ali

Sometimes it makes sense to just punch the air n say i did it.

ps. trash the last post. I need to improve my html coding.

12:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good blog!!! BUT...BUT...Dearie... dont even try being modest HERE!! :) where we are, it just doesnt help to be modest, right??!! ;) however I agree, no need bragging about things to people like doodhvala or other unrelated people...


7:56 PM  
Blogger anon_iitian said...

I have to agree with you!!!
We think on similiar lines.

I think a task is half done, if we have realized that its tough or difficult. Since an attempt made in the direction would be serious.

So lets make an effort in the same direction and live happily

4:48 AM  
Blogger Di said...

love the sentence too.. its so hard hitting and so simple na..

6:06 AM  
Blogger SEV said...

Couldn't actually reply to your comment - the email was wrong ?

For me the freakiest part of the video was the eyes. Those are the first things I really appreciate - besides more obvious things ;)

And for a more relevant comment - its a valid point about modesty : a fine line between being a braggart and shying away from due credit. Possibly being modest leads to phenomenal success ? ;)

11:13 AM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

chitrangada---> I think I agree with you that in today's conmpetitive times its difficult to go ahead if you don't promote yourself. I guess that is why it is so difficult being modest in today's times :)

aashun---> great shot, look at the pride on his face :-p

N---> LOL, haan yaar I can't disagree with you on that one! Iss place ki baat hi kuch aur hai ;)

II'tian---> cheers to happiness!

di---> Ya, totally. It bumped me right out of morning high! :)

sev---> I might have put in an extra character in my email address by mistake. BVTW, I forwarded that video to all my friends--all the men were freaked out, all the women thought where in the world were these makeover people on their wedding days! JK :) I will have to reach that level of modesty to answer your last question! :p

4:23 PM  
Anonymous pria said...

Modest?? Hmm I don't think we can satisfy everbody, but we can atleast be that way to ourselves.

7:34 PM  
Blogger Strider said...

Agreed that being modest is pretty difficult .. but isnt taking credit for something we have acheived without being immodest equally difficult??

8:46 PM  
Blogger Aashun said...

glad that you like the pose. One of my all time fav.

12:10 PM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:19 AM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

pria---> yep, that would be a good start

strider---> I think we are saying the same thing. I believe that it is very difficult being modest when you have achieved something really good in your own eyes.

aashun---> One of my favs is the one with the 'We can do it' tagline- (Rosie the Riveter). It is a feminist's dream poster but I like it because it is just very cool :)

11:21 AM  
Blogger Naveen said...

Wow! Really true..but dont you think modesty can do charms for ppl who are already successful but not for ppl who are in the process of succeeding? This is not a perfect world and if you dont display your skills/achievements in the name of modesty, you'll be stamped as a loser!!

8:24 PM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

naveen---> what you said is sad but true, that's why I feel that being modest is difficult especially these days when 'selling yourself as a brand' is something so common and required for success!

2:23 PM  
Blogger sreicanth said...

i'd say ...
no one knows how much effort you put for an achievement,but you.
everyone has different capabilities..and different situations ...different frames of mind....plus we're all but human....
so its not practical to expect other people to be modest/caring/honest/senstitive....

the best thing one can do is be that oneself..a promise to oneself.....and that would really do the job.

12:22 PM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

sreicanth---> yep, I agree with that and that is what the last line of my blog says :) BTW, that's a very interesting way to spell your name!

9:52 AM  
Blogger PSV said...

intehaaa ho gayi....intezaar ki.....

next post please.
awesome fan mail..sahi hai...

7:19 PM  
Blogger Vasanth said...

tnx for your "not-so" modest comment on my blog..your blog seems like fun. Will read it sometime !! Good luck with your modesty stint !!

7:55 PM  
Blogger Sudipta Chatterjee said...

There is a fine line we need to draw between being modest and being assertive. Sometimes you need to remind yourself of your good qualities, your achievements so as not to lose confidence in the face of adversity. On the other hand, we know that the branch of the tree that bears the heaviest fruit bows down the most as well.

I liked this post. BTW, why did you suddenly change the template, your nickname, etc?

1:32 AM  
Blogger shruti said...

modesty is somewhat that one learns from his experience...

5:42 AM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

psv---> Work's been crazy off late but shall post something up very soon, pakka :)

vasanth---> lol :) hey sorry if you felt offended by my comments on your blog. It wasn't a question of being immodest, I just got a little protective of my species ;)

sudipta---> thanks...and I do agree with what you said about being assertive v/s immodest. About the template change---I thought I was getting bored with the old look and the name change---well lets just say I want to enjoy anonymity for a change :)

shruti---> agreed :)

10:20 AM  
Blogger sreicanth said...

@lifelover: yeah thats a strange spelling...i kept getting asked that question...ppl think its numerology....real reason is too simple...couldnt get the blogger id with the right spelling...so tweaked it a bit..bas! :)

12:43 AM  
Blogger Twisted DNA said...

Wow, you hit the nail on the head! You are so right, you need to achieve some level to be modest to start with :) Very nice post.

3:30 PM  
Blogger Life Lover said...

sreicanth---> yah I feel it gives a very metrosexual edge to the traditional name :)

twisted dna---> thanks!

11:03 AM  
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